Cat fights, crowns, and criminals.

Um, I can think of scads and scads of bizarre-o stuff I could write about gender roles in Ze Motherland, aka Russia, my former home. Living there, as a woman, was a constant adventure. I found out the hard way, for example, that any woman who sits on a bench outside of a metro station is a prostitute. I also learned the interesting medical fact that cold concrete can make a woman infertile. Other no-nos? Crossing one's legs, lighting your own cigarette, and stepping outside without 5 layers of make-up and sky high heels. (This last was surprisingly hard for me. Stateside, I get mocked for my couture addiction and absurd shoes, but Christ! There, women don't even step out to get the paper without lipstick, dangly sparkling earrings, and skin-tight miniskirts!) I had plenty of guy friends, but it was awfully hard to meet girls my age.

A lot of these weird traditions and quirks are cultural things; many more are due to the large demographic imbalance between men & women - Russia has the biggest male-female population gap in the developed world, and because there are so many more ladies than gents, it leads to an almost Darwinian struggle to find - and retain - a mate. But, of all the weirdness I encountered on my own in my life in Russia as a young lady, nothing quite compares to this.

Wowza. Barring all the other snark, the thing that really gets me is this: women, alas, tend to be catty creatures to begin with. Russian women - well, we have refined it almost to an art form. Beauty pageant contestants are notoriously competitive and have even resorted to bizarre capers (like pepper spray in evening gowns) to try and win the coveted crown. So encouraging a bunch of pent-up felons to compete for a title .... well, I don't think it will result in the crowning of Miss Congeniality. And if you look at the faces of the other contestants behind the woman in the video who wins the pageant - well, they look like they want to kill her, and among this swath of the population....it may not be such an empty threat! Bozhe moy.