What would Freud say?

I can confidently attest to the fact that today's WTH vignette has all the elements of a classic: reproductive organs, senseless violence, sorcery, and a liberal sprinkling of the absurd. My friends, today we discuss a very serious topic: lynchings in Congo due to penis theft.

Yes, penis theft. Kinshasa, the nation's capital (I take issue with the country's legal name, as it is neither Democratic nor a Republic...however, all sides seem to agree that it is, in fact, the Congo) is in an uproar over allegations that sorcerers have been using black magic to shrink men's penises or steal them altogether.

Let that percolate through your mind for a moment, if you will.... Taxi drivers with gold teeth (ah, it's the details that make it so utterly precious!) are being labeled as shamans and accused of trying to extort money from men. The threat if $$$ isn't coughed up? Penis theft. WOWZA. Even better, the article alludes to an episode in Ghana over a decade ago where - and I quote - "twelve suspected penis snatchers were beaten to death." Not to mock the deceased....but what precisely goes in the obituary in such an occasion?

"I'm tempted to say it's one huge joke," an official says. Joke or not, I'm laughing! But the minister's response is simply priceless: "But when you try to tell the victims that their penises are still there, they tell you that it's become tiny or that they've become impotent. To that I tell them, 'How do you know if you haven't gone home and tried it?'"

I have no words. Just......what the hella?!